You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
