My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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