yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Someone signed my nipple.
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