How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
