Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
