just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Randomize
