Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
