By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
