WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Randomize
