very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
