Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Randomize