I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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