I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
