Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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