One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
