so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
