If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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