You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
