Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
