Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
