I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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