Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Is it because I queefed?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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