Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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