It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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