when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize