Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
