they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
