Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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