I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Even the bartender felt bad for me
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize