I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Randomize
