Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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