When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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