Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
