Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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