i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
