so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
