she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
