Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize