Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
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