Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize