trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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