Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize