It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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