My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
