It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
