if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
