I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
