is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
