Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
