brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
