I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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